Looking For Ayahuasca: Part 6
So this gun was poking me. It was like crazy rude. I wanted to sleep for like two hours more but he was not listening to me. He was yelling at me in Spanish to get up. I tried to explain to him that I was a very respected journalist in America.
"Why do you just assume I know how to speak English?" said the man.
"You do," I said.
"Well yes, but it's like racist to think that," said the man.
"Listen, trust me, I know. I survived in this jungle for weeks," I said.
"20 minutes is how long it's been," said the man.
Clearly that was wrong. I mean a life of playing Minecraft had expertly taught me how to survive in the wilderness. That's why I was living in a hole, like Paul from the video game Minecraft. At this point I tried to guess the width of the hole, which we could argue was either great or really great. I was hit again.
And I blacked out again. On TV, it happens after one. In real life it takes a lot more than once. It takes six or seven times and then you forget that guy's name whose married to your mom.