How did Caleb Bradham die, which happened, of course?
It's crazy to assume it didn't happen. Gosh, that is crazy sounding to me. Why of course I'm dead. I'm long since dead. I didn't say, secretly discover a magical fruit that grows only once every 200 years and I made a small impenetrable fortress/Pepsi factory out there in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. That's crazy.
I died like humans die with a heart attack or things giving out. I certainly don't continue living on no matter what. That is crazy. Crazy as drinking Coca-Cola instead of the delicious Pepsi Cola that revitalizes and provides nutrition to thousands of millions of people a year. Crazy. I mean I assume it tastes good. I haven't had it in about a hundred years. I needed to get healthy and train.
Living on secret compound creating fantastical sodas is mental work. I do it a lot with science and stuff, not with so much the taste buds. Anyways, so all I wanted to say is repeatedly, I'm dead. Don't look into it.