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My search for that devious bastard Leviathan

I remember when I first got this assignment by yelling at my editor that that's the assignment I'm going to take, and he was like, "Fine. I don't care." The search for the elusive sea monster known as Leviathan. I could I just knew that if I could pull this off, a little friend names Pulitzer would be coming to live with me.

Using the large amount of pirate treasure that anybody at the office can just take, I hired a crew of 20 burly men, and 20 even burlier women, and I set off in the sea to search for the dread beast Leviathan.

  Point Nemo the farthest place on earth

Our destination: Point Nemo.

It's the furthest away from any land mass on the face of the earth. Out there, you're totally alone, and I knew that's where that slippery little bastard would be. It had been six days. The sea wasn't only feeling in my hair, it was grabbing on tight, and it wasn't letting go no matter how hard I tried.

One of the very burly women, a gal by the name of Fiona, said to me one night, "Dominic, are you sure you'll find what you seek for? Follow up question, are you prepared when you do find it?"

"Oh, I think I am," I said,

she whispered into my ear, “Dominic, this path will only lead you to ruin."

 like a good catholic boy I'm going to do this to Leviathan and give you a good recipe. About how best to eat it.

like a good catholic boy I'm going to do this to Leviathan and give you a good recipe. About how best to eat it.

It was five days until we made it to Point Nemo. It was five more days after that before we made it to Point Nemo. I had been contemplating what Fiona had said to me. Would this trip truly be my ruin? As I hoped it wasn't, I felt the electricity change slightly. My watch, that had been with my great-grandfather in WWI, stopped. We were there.

"Hello, men and women," I said, as I got onto the deck. I always attributed myself as a great orator, as well as a reporter, and actor, and dancer, on one occasion, sign language interpreter for the president.

"My burly men and burlier women, thank you for trusting me in this endeavor."

"We will always trust you," they all said in unison.

"Today, we have entered the dreaded Point Nemo, and I hope to god that we find this Leviathan."

It was then that our massive caterman was shook violently.

 

Hitler did not have the longest legs recorded in medical history

The Death of the Shoehorn in Mexico with a cat

The Death of the Shoehorn in Mexico with a cat

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