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Sandman is clearly the best Spider-Man villain

He has sand powers. I don't see no one else around here claiming that they've got sand powers. Everybody on this simple bayou goes, like, "No, Green Goblin: best Spider-Man villain."

 spiderman sandman

Listen, man. I'm just a simple shrimpin' captain, but I've got to say, Sandman, best You aint think about it  You're walking on some sand, or like in Spider-Man's case he's just swinging through New York minding his own business, he sees some sand, he goes, like, "Boy, that looks like a bunch of fun sand to play around in. I should play around in that sand and just have myself a fun Spider-Man time," and boom, man. Sandman. That's why Sandman's the best villain, man. All right. All right, man.

Nobody at publishing house is exactly sure why they put out a book about Sexy Vampire Watermelons.

Shifty-eyed doctor declares that memory loss is common for men.

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